unjustified.


So tell me exactly what went wrong? I have your interests at heart, but you're just plain narrow-minded and totally giving in to your emotions. I was rather surprised knowing whatever remarks you passed on to whoever, were just so unjustified. I was taken aback, yes, and i could not stop questioning and blaming myself as to why you're reacting this way. I tried all attempts to get to you, but you chose to play dumb and put on a deafening ear. I was lost, but after hearing things out from whoever, i now understand.

So tell me; when you first dated him and went totally bonkers over him, did i mind one bit? No, i did not. I confronted you, yes, but because i can see how happy you were, i decided to not let my emotions get on to me and laid low, totally ignoring my own feelings of being the odd one out and feeling unwanted.

When you introduced me to him, and when we went out as a trio; did i mind one bit that you were lovey dovey with each other and i had to suck in the jealousy of being unloved? No, i did not. I was sad, yes, but your happpiness mattered and i did not care one bit if i could not share that same lovey dovey moments you did with him.

When you broke dates with me, because you had plans with him, was i ever angry or upset till i ignored you? No, i was not. I never ever took it to heart that your priority was him. And as upset as i was for being left alone before, I cared for you and i've never ever been selfish nor self-centered. I always try to put you first, instead of myself, because thats how things have always been. But i guess i've made a mistake all these while.

Maybe you're just totally oblivious for the fact that cycles like such usually happens to everyone. After all, its part and parcel of growing up and everyone goes through such phases. Dont tell me you didnt go through all these? I'm sure you did, when you were with him.

Instead of being happy for me, you're being rather selfish or rather, ignorant. I cant stop you for making those claims, but one thing's for sure; the dearest boy and myself were not out to make you feel unwanted nor left out. Infact, the dearest boy made numerous efforts to get better acquaintted to you and cheered you up. And all that on his own accord.

I'm sorry if you felt that way. You of all people should know that i will NEVER belittle you nor make you feel that way. It was never my intention to make you sad, upset, angry and whatever else you said you were feeling. And i'm really truly sorry for having sent you back home late. Like i told you before, i will take the rap, as how i always have. Your parents can curse, swear, scold me for all i care. Nothing's new.

Now let me make my stand. Dont blame me if you had a lousy start of the day during our outing. It was not my fault that you and your boyfriend had a tiff and were unhappy with each other. I tried my best to cheer you up and so did the dearest boy. I even tried to make peace for you and your boyfriend, if you remembered. You cant blame me for the sudden crazy hormonal mood changes in you. I'm trying my best here to understand you. I really am. You cant blame me if i lead such a crazy life.

Maybe you'll be reading this, maybe you'll not. Either way, i dont care. I had to get this off my chest. If in any way the dearest boy and myself had made you upset by simply being ourselves, we apologise. Instead of having to hear it from soembody else, i would appreciate it if you would come clean with me and say what you have to say, straight to my face.

The dearest boy and friends think i should just ignore and shrug this childish act of misunderstanding off, but i beg to differ. I'm trying to place myself in your shoes, so that i can understand you better. And i've decided to rely on my source and give you time to cool down and think through the past events. Maybe all that has happened was an act of impulsive decision making; i would not know.

But i hope you'll calm down and have some sense. Lets have some maturity in all these. I'm so sick and tired of playing mind games. I had enough.

Bottomline is; you matter and i would not hurt you.