I've nothing much to say right now. My mood's been dampened. My health has been deteriorating. My life has just started to get pretty much more and more confusing. I don't even know what's going on in my life anymore. I can't think straight. I seem to have this super unparallel mixed emotions toying my mind. I'm starting to HATE work. All i can think of is; party hard and get myself wasted. I wanna go back to school! In all, i seem to be like a pretty lost kid.
I'm hoping i'll be able to save enough money by the end of the year and accept Curtin's offer to pursue my studies. That way, i can leave this stupid country and bring my parents abroad and reunite with all the other relatives there. Gawddd.
There's so much i want to say to you.
Hell, i don't even know where to begin.
I miss you so much.
But i'm starting to hate you.
And you should know why.
I don't even know who the hell you are anymore.
Fuck, i don't even think you care.
I'm due for a freaking scope this coming tuesday. Oesophagogastroduodenoscopy. Hell, everything's happening so fast. Nothing much needs to be said. I just need to focus my attention on getting well and hopefully this stupid viral flu will go away and curse someone else, so that i can peacefully go for the scope and seek treatment! *ARGH*
GAWDDD.
Let it be over and done with.
No more milk/dairy products for me. More intake on hi-fibre diets. Blah3... And just so you know, i'm gonna have my hair cut after all is well. :) And my current motivational song; Hero by Mariah Carey.
~And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside and you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth that a hero lies in you.~
It's really fucking therapeutic i tell you. Well, it beats listening to some other mellow beats. Nevertheless, here's a sneap peak at what or rather how my hair will look like IF i ever decide to cut it.
That's it for now.
